If life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. So, after two decades of unfruitful search for a life partner, I decided to throw in the towel and to read up on adoption. Because being my authentic self and living a fulfilling life means that my life isn’t complete without motherhood. As suggested by some people, marrying a man with children is not an option for me.
So, when I started reading up, I was shocked to find out that in Holland the age limit for adoption is 40, the waiting list at least four years and that adoption is so expensive that it’s only affordable for the very good fortunate. Even if I were to have the money, with an age limit of 40 I should have applied when I was 36, but then, I was still hoping that I would bump into a great partner and that we still would have some time left to have a wonderful time to start our own family. Sigh. Life didn’t give in. Because of the age limit, I was s afraid I had to give up on adoption, too.
Then, luckily, I bumped into interesting articles on the Internet of American couples and singles who adopted later, after 45, in life. My hope blossomed. I have time to realize my dreams and if I plan and execute well motherhood can become reality for me. This week added some flavor to my motherhood dream as I read an article (50 over 50 series in Huffington Post) of an American woman, 50, who adopted two young children simultaneousl. And, yesterday, I saw a video of Emma Thompson who adopted her African son when he was 16. I was smiling. It showed me another way how children can come into your life. Due to war, poverty and disasters, worldwide many young children and teenagers become homeless and are forced to live without their parents or any support system. These children crave for a safe home, a family to rely on and love, too.
I finally start to believe in my heart that motherhood is something I can realize in this life time. I release the worry and find some ease. In my heart, I know that God will find a way to bring me my family at the right time. I finally grasp what a hindu pundit told me to do, have faith and God will in unexpected ways. My life isn’t perfect but at least it can become whole if I stay true to my authentic self.